Self Assisted

08. Asanas - Postures and Physical Culture
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Pre pandemic, assists were an important part of asana class for me, a good assist, anywhere between a fingertip and a palm, deepened a position especially in this ‘active’ body, and there was the human contact, no matter how small, that was subtly arousing. Post pandemic, assists seem retired, at least in my yoga circle, but in the absence and out of self discovery, I found a much better alternative, the self assist.

I’ve made posts on how touch is enhanced in a conductive body that can access silence, in this yogi’s experience, enhanced in a noticeable subtle arousal, given silence and attention can fully open the shushumna. My current class is a cross between a flow and yin, so plenty of opportunities to fully engage in a position and self assist in whatever way the body is asking to be touched. Any inch of my legs beg for touch, perhaps they are so overlooked most times. In finding silence in a position, with gentle attention where self meets self, the body finds its desires and the shushumna opens.

Would appreciate comments on assists in your practice, the idea of self assisting.

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Hi Dogboy,

For me “self assisting” has been a very addictive form of pleasure during my twice daily asana practice, where I would through small adjustments in the posture produce increasingly higher levels of pre-orgasmic pleasure in my spine. Especially back bends (like cobra and locust) and spinal twist have this amazing potential for me at the moment. The heart centering warm up is pretty much a “self assist” in the way you describe it using the hands. A lot of pleasure and fascinating scenery arises for me when I touch myself in this way with the hands.

I started a while ago to make my asana practice somewhat less self-indulgent by sticking to the recommended 10-15 seconds holds of each posture and releasing the posture’s sensation and name into silence using Samyama. Still a lot of pleasure but it now feels more like a yoga practice again (rather than a sophisticated solo tantra ritual). Maybe there is nothing wrong with turning an asana practice into a sophisticated form of solo tantra, but for me it was also an attempt to self-pace energy symptoms.

Sense of touch is for me also becoming increasingly more pleasurable in all sorts of everyday situations. Especially when touch is meaningful, like when petting my cat, or resting my hand on my partner’s chest when falling asleep, I allow myself to get absorbed in my hand and fingers, utterly stunned by how it can be possible to experience so much ecstasy, bliss and love in such mundane situations.

There seems to be a new layer of sense of touch on my skin. There is still the old sense, which is what makes it into my conscious experience most of the time when the sense of touch is involved and relevant in consciousness in normal activity. But on top of that old sense there is this new layer that is capable of experiencing ecstasy and bliss. This new layer first appeared on isolated locations on my body, but these spots have grown to cover the entire surface of the body. This actually makes me currently a bit wary of getting touched by others in casual ways, because they don’t know how much pleasure I could derive from that seemingly casual touch. I will probably get used to it by the time even crazier effects from my AYP practice have become the new normal :smiling_face_with_sunglasses:

So, I would say, if you enjoy the touch during your asana practice (by yourself or others), go for it! And you can always back off again, should it in some ways become too much.

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I may have mentioned it before, it’s like we are twins, thanks for sharing your experiences. It has only been a few years that touch has become an accelerator, when given gentle attention/intention. If one is sensitive, then yes, self pacing and grounding are the fixes, that does not seem so for this yogi at present. The act of an assist was always a connection to the teacher and the pandemic took that away, right as I was discovering the teacher and the silence inside. It is beautiful the way you describe the importance of touch, do you feel you must self pace?

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Yeah, it feels good to know some other people who experience the sequence and character of rising ecstatic conductivity somewhat similar. It’s interesting how different it is for different people, compared to the rising of inner silence, where the only major variable seems to be the time frame, and not so much how it’s perceived.

If you’re still going to these yoga classes, maybe you can ask the instructor for reinstating the assistance? And it also sounds like that the absence might have been a good thing, making your inner guru taking over the assisting.

About my self-pacing exploration, it’s a longer topic. Maybe I should open a new thread for this. And I’m still in the process of understanding it better… Here is the start of it and summary:

In my first two years of AYP I took on a lot of practices very quickly (more quickly than recommended), and had an amazing and smooth run for two years, zero symptoms of overdoing while perceiving fast progress. Then I noticed some issues with my finger tips of index finger and thumb, both left and right. There was callus forming (despite no mechanical or chemical strain) which reduced the sensitivity in that old layer of the sense of touch, while the new layer (of the sense of touch) felt irritating, like a mild burn. Doctors (including one ayurvedic) and a dermatologist I have consulted haven’t seen anything like it, but thought it harmless. Nothing they recommended (creams, food supplements, dietary changes) had any effect on the condition.

It took me quite some time to accept and establish (through try-and-error) a cause-and-effect relationship with my yoga practice. Also, the irritation of the skin at my finger tips is a small thing compared to all the good stuff that is caused by my AYP practices, so I don’t mind. However, I do mind if the condition worsens, because it would indicate an unstable (not sustainable over weeks) practice. From my trial and error experiments, I know it can spread to other fingers and the palms. So, my currently quite short practice time, including the experimentation with samyama during asana practice is part of better understanding my “edge”. The edge of maximum stable speed that is sustainable for good comfort over weeks.

To this end, I was also exploring various grounding activities lately, including Tai Chi. I will give an update here soon. Tai Chi practice does provide a short-term release of the irritating sensation in my finger tips. Something no long walk has ever managed. Time will tell, if it can reduce the symptoms sufficiently that I can increase AYP practices again.