After my sitting practices, I have included a “spiritual masturbation” on a weekly basis. It’s basically a masturbation where with Mulabandha and semen retention at the moment of orgasm (semen retention using the finger technique).
I progressively raise the sexual energy and let my body be filled with it. It had amazing results on me (accurate concentration, more energy, increased focus… ).
It changed also the intercourses with my wife, as i’m able now to have the thing fully under control, and don’t come so easily to an ejaculation. If an ejaculatory orgasm should come, I also use the finger technique to block it, so no semen is sent away. The problem with is is the folowing: I also want to offer my semen to my wife as she enjoys it. Furthermore is she pregnant and it could help her for her pregnancy symptoms.
If I have an ejaculation into her, I experience a huge loss of prana the day after. I’m sleepy and focus is also strongly lessen.
I don’t know if I should put these practice on pause, or not. What would you advice?
Love,
Niels
You will find what works for you to balance your tantric practice with your spiritual path, daily activity, marriage and family life. You have raised the questions, and the answers will be there in stillness, not necessarily coming from somewhere else, but from your own experience. You have everything you need, and will find balance. Others are welcome to chime in, of course.
Wonderful that your wife is pregnant, bringing new life into the world. It is a sacred calling.
I wanted you to thank you so much for your work, and the support that you provide to all of us in that divine quest. WIthout you,I think that a lot of us would have turned to scattered knowledge, unefficient methods. Moreover, you decided to remain anonymous and not to cultivate any cult of personnality. It is for me the greatest human quality.
My wife and I were reading your last message regarding our baby and went very emotional. In the name of the whole AYP community, thank you Yogani.
Rarely anything is black and white, and loss of semen, from semen, falls into that. It is only a part of the equation, as is your wife. Share it with your wife if she would like that, it is an offering to Shakti. Retain in between. Before kids in our marriage I released semen every third time; all other times it was all about her, and to think I wasn’t even a yogi then. Your loving intentions should overcome “effects” from ejaculation, besides once a yogi experiences natural vajroli, loss is less noticeable.
Niels, I sense a kindness and great depth to your Bhakti. After ~ 6 years on this journey I have come to accept what Yogani is saying here, the answers come from within. I have been waiting for some moment where all the effort to draw the prana upward to lead to some special moment of revelation. I envision a crown opening making all this make sense. I imagine if I were to ask Yogani he would likely encourage me to return to my practices and not be distracted by “scenery”. It does seem it is about the journey not the destination. You are in a wonderful situation on the precipice of a magical transformation of your family unit. Enjoy all of the rich moments. Ease up on your self imposed rules. Focus on the love and connection with your wife. I suspect you will find a way to balance your sharing with your wife and maintaining your energy. A new reality may come in the near future where she is no longer interested in intercourse as the changing hormones and pregnancy can change her desire as well as nursing and raising a small child while being sleep deprived. I suspect you will have time to return to sacred masturbation over time.