Hi dear friends, i am still india now but have left amma’s ashram yesterday. First hand experience with amma’s person is that her felt radiance and ongoing giving are really amazing. It is enough to c her at work to know she is beyond human… With her i felt like i am in the presence of someone like jesus and not just another guru or teacher… But this goes for amma… Concerning the ashram conditions and the behavior of the residents and some of the swamies and brahmasharias and so on… I don’t want to do any bashing but it’s really unhealthy…
As per lesson learned up till this time. We r in love with the light not the enlightened person. Take the good and leave the bad from any teacher. As yoganiji says the real guru is in us.
Love,
Ananda
Hi Ananda,
Glad to hear you benefitted from your time at Amma’s.
Regarding the behaviour of some of the residents, swamis and brahmacharis etc, I once attended a satsang where Amma was asked about this directly. Amma said that her ashram was a mental hospital. People come there because they are mentally sick and they need healing. So if they behave at times like they are mental patients it is because they are.
When people are healed, Amma sends them away. 
All the best
Christi
p.s.
Amma hasn’t sent me away yet. I’m not sure what that means…?
A mental hospital needs doctors and orderlies…
A mental hospital needs doctors and orderlies…
Amma is both the doctor and the staff. She is also the medicine and the cure. :slight_smile:
Well then I guess we will have to wait and see when she sends you away eh? 
Much Love!
Dear friends, as i said earlier i don’t want to do any bashing but just to make smthg clear i wasn’t talking about the mental state of these people. If anything they are really smart and cunning. Maybe a visit to the x amma group on yahoo could explain what’s on my mind. May god forgive me if i am unfair but i’ve seen and heard things which makes a person unease… I really fell in love with amma during my stay. If there is an avatar on earth then it’s her… But i couldn’t shake off that uneasy feeling while there. Plus talking to some of the people who have been there for a long time and reading about gayatri’s account… One of the first western devotees who stayed with amma for many years and then left… Needless to say i have my doubts. I think of amma as another adi da, best to approach with caution and not get too involved.
TGIY 
the Here and Now…no need to go anywhere…personally do not feel at all the longing to go to ashrams anymore
Hi Ananda,
Even people who are really smart or cunning can have psychological issues. In fact mental pain is the first and foremost characteristic of the unawakened state. Enlightenment is largely the awakening from a state of mental pain and psychological imbalance into a state of balance, bliss and love.
One of the ways that Amma works is through directly challenging people’s sense of identity and psychological contraction. Some people welcome this and are grateful for the chance to surrender more fully and open further in trust and love, whereas other people find it more challenging and difficult.
Being in the presence of a master is a huge opportunity for spiritual growth, but it can also be very challenging on many levels.
One word of advice that Yogani often gives is to take the good and leave the bad. Another, that I would give, is not to get too caught up in other people’s struggles. Remember that a lot of what you hear may not be true at all, or may be tarnished by the pain that someone else is going through as they awaken more fully to reality. It can be a hard journey for some people. Be open and supportive, but do not get dragged down or side-tracked.
Christi
Dear christi, you might be right in what you shared i got taken away with what i’ve read and heard. I mean amma surpassed all my expectations but what i’ve read and heard just doesn’t make me at ease. It’s enough it’s out there. So yogani’s advise on taking the good and leaving the bad seems like the best approach here. Namaste
Dear friends, I know I said that their are bad rumors about Amma but I simply don’t care much about those… Even though they might be there… Even personnas like Jesus and the prophet Muhammad had bad rumors around them and their are some stuff which they said which I do not agree with and some of the facts of their lives are unknown to us.
If anything my meeting with Amma has been like a meeting with the divine mother Kali… I have been connected to Kali Ma since many years back and the connection was an on and off thing without any intention from my part… It kept on happening every few months or so… I didn’t think I would be involved directly in worshiping the divine mother but here I am now… She pulled me to amma in India and she showed me Amma as her manifestation… To be honest I saw my sheikh and Ramana Maharshi and all the saints I’ve met and heard of in Amma… I was there yet even Amma with all her grandeur… She was like non existent for me… There was just Shakti, the divine mother… Now I have a spiritual father in Tunis and a spiritual mother in India and a sound of reason called Yogani in my head… I know all are but colors and figures and there is only oneness… But I am still limited in my egoic center and am a very tired person now, and resting in the laps and hands of the divine mother is the best rest and healing I can get.
Love and respect,
Ananda
Yes!
Jai Ma!
Amma <=> Ma Kali //this is what is experienced over here within these two days…Thank you Ananda for being her Channel
All Love.
Dear it’s all just you and ma, i have no role in this. I am in need of her help more than others most probably… Namaste
Ma is here is here.But experiencing Amma as Ma was only last night.& that is from from your side.
Don’t have much role myself either .Ma in action.
Thank you again!
She is that’s true… Her presence is very much felt today
Namaste
Got to see Amma today
How I was able to make it is a small miracle - between a busy work morning, travel this afternoon and the location being unfavorable to easy access/parking, I didn’t think I could… But yesterday, I thought about her, felt a pang of longing and surrendered, thinking that if she wants to bless me, she will get me there… With no effort at all, I was able to switch my work schedule… And found that some friends were also going, and they insisted on driving many extra miles to pick me up and drop me off
Clearly she wanted me there!
The minute she walked in, the tears started flowing… Felt my whole being vibrating during the guided meditation… And felt unusually anxious as my turn for the hug came up… It might have been brief, but felt like an eternity being in her embrace… She kept whispering “beautiful daughter” in my ear in my native language… And the tears flowed and flowed… Sitting to the side, I was lost, unable to form a single coherent thought, trembling like a leaf…
Even though I’ve had her Darshan before, this was different. She seemed to look right through me as I knelt down… Someone said I could ask a question if I wanted to, but not one single thing came up… Yet she gave me something I can’t yet put in words.
Still feel her touch, and the trembling continues… As do the tears writing this… Returning,I knew what I need to do - visit her ashram during my next trip to India.
Thank you my dearest Parallax, for gently nudging me to not miss this Darshan. As always, you know exactly what I need at any given time. <3
Love,
kami
sweet