Hello,
I’m new to this forum. I’m a man in my 40s, name is Margo.
I am looking for help with the symptoms of kundalini syndrome. Below is a brief overview of what happened, I’ll elaborate later if necessary.
Between 2019-2025 I meditated on second, third and fourth chakra (with kundalini Mahamantra) under the guidance of Om Swami. I have received initiation from Om Swami.
I participated in the Navarna Tantra Sadhana in Himalayas in January 2025 and soon after that I also performed the 40 days Ucchista Ganapati Sadhana. I was probably not ready to perform tantric sadhanas, I lacked the necessary preparation, guidance and inner purity.
March last year, couple week after tantric sadhana I did an impure act - I watched obscenity (sex-porn videos) from internet. I can say that I was addicted to porn, but I didn’t let this addiction come up very often. I watched sex videos about 5-7 times a year, or on average once every few months. Afterwards, I always felt bad about it. A few weeks after watching the obscenity that took place in March 2025 kundalini syndrome-psychosis started with several painful symptoms. At the beginning my perception of reality changed - suddenly I saw the whole world as Devi’s energy and experienced Devi’s anger that I had spoiled my pure, high and beautiful energy, which I had received as a result of my guru´s and Devi’s blessing and sadhanas. At the same time I felt how golden honey-like energy was removed from my second chakra. Next morning complete impotence followed, along with a feeling of nausea and pain and a vacuum feeling in the lower abdomen. Around 10 days later I started to feel “alien” energy in head, heat and pressure in the head and ears, Heat in the legs, hallucinations, pain and paralysis-like condition in the neck, pain in the spine area, pain in the arms, legs, ringing in the ears, etc. The condition became so severe that it was a near-death experience - I felt like I was either going to die or end up paralyzed in a (psychiatric) hospital. Going to work became completely impossible for several months. Since May of last year, I started receiving acupuncture and doing exercises under the guidance of a yoga therapist. Yoga exercises were designed to improve the movement of prana in the body and cool the head. From July to August last year, I walked barefoot on the grass, doing grounding.
Now, more than a year later, the very acute and symptoms have subsided, but the impotence remains, as well as some dizziness, moderate pressure and some heat in the head also. I am still like in a fog and continue to experience mild nausea every day. Along with impotence, my libido has also gone. I get tired quickly, sleeping is possible only with sleeping pills. Some days I still experience heat in my hands and feet, as well as mild nerve pain. And depression of course. Unfortunately I have not received help from my guru (Om Swami), In March last year he separated for a long period of solitude, where he was not even available to his students.
If anyone has any ideas where I could get help, I would be very grateful.
Margo
