Yes people need different things but I think a couple of things are inarguable such as the mainstream tantra community presenting themselves as teaching a path to enlightenment when they do not etc.
Yes people need different things but I think a couple of things are inarguable such as the mainstream tantra community presenting themselves as teaching a path to enlightenment when they do not etc.
nothing is inarguable
That’s not true at all.
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From my experience it is true, although the length of the dopamine cycle may not be exactly two weeks as it probably differs from person to person.
Thank you for your posts markern!
That’s not true at all.
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From my experience it is true, although the length of the dopamine cycle may not be exactly two weeks as it probably differs from person to person.
Thank you for your posts markern!
Yes, I'd say that it differs markedly from person to person. As with everything. Some people tend to have an issue with proclaiming broad generalizations as fact. I'm not a big fan :stuck_out_tongue:
do you all completely understand what’s going on in your relationships?
do you know the mind of the other?
wow, all these words and opinions based on extra very little information.
sorry, I find this hilarious.
she’s doing what she feels she’s gotta do, and to suggest that it’s wrong makes no sense to me.
how would you know, getting this information from a secondary source?
That’s crazy!
Do you realize that?
Sorry if this offends, but it’s pretty logical.
we love our opinions, don’t we, myself included BTW.
I’m no different.
Hello Siar 
Have you told her from the heart how you feel about this? It’s not clear to me from your words how deeply you’ve discussed it, beyond letting her know you disapprove. That could make a difference. For example, if you come at her with judgment and disapproval, she is likely to resist what you’re saying. But if you tell her how you feel, in terms of emotion, anger, sadness, feeling hurt, etc. without blaming her, it will be easier for her to listen and hear you out. Listening to her feelings without judgment is equally important.
You mentioned that she planned on doing the Tantra training since before you met. Did you ever tell her at some point you were okay with her doing the training? And have you both agreed to be monogamous?
Wish you the best with this, Siar. It’s tough and I wish I had something useful to say. I know I would feel hurt if I were in your situation. My love to you, bro.
With Love <3
cosmic
Hi Cosmic,
I have told her how I feel about it all in recent days, alot of tears were shed both from her and myself. Somehow its turning into an incosolable difference yet we still are deeply in love with eachother somehow.
We keep talking but nothing gets resolved, we just keep speaking to eachother and its really starting to become this exercise of rehashing what has already been said.
What keeps coming up is that she understands my viewpoint and thinks its completely reasonable to feel the way I do and she feels guilty and bad about it and feels that she is being very unfair to me. On the same note she feels she’s being unfair to herself for feeling that way and that the realm of reason should have as little to do with her life as possible “Why do things always have to make logical sense to you?” “Why do you relie so much on reason?” are a few lines I constantly here from here.
From me I say “Why is it so hard to not be sexually intimate with other people in a monogomous relationship?” To which she has no answer and usually lapses into silence or changes the topics or starts crying.
I just dont know anymore… I see the end of my relationship coming very soon. I’m not happy about it.
Hi Siar88,
it is very harsh to see a relationship end and you can’t do much about it. I went through it too. Sometimes there is just a differnece in your life style that splits you apart. You might be able to sustain the relationship for a while but in the end the difference might be too big. That is just from my experience though… If your point is clear and you will not accept that she is going out to those work shops she will have to decide what she wants.
Be strong and follow your heart! That’s the only advice that I can give you. It helped me.
Hi all,
After much thought I realized that I might have too much of a constrictive effect on her wants. She has other interests such as burleqsue dancing and nude photography (not porno).
My initial reaction to these was to say no she can’t do it while in a relationship and she had given up on both the aformentioned.
After much thought i realized that tantra bothered me more than both of mentioned activies due to its sexual intimate nature with other people, wherehas burlesque dancing, while still a peep show, is not intimate and nude photography is purely art.
So I said to her that I did not mind if she did those things again and since then she has seemed to (although has not directly admitted it) adhere to my wishes concerning tantra.
I guess her willfullness and determination to do all that tantra had to offer was a unconscious response to my limiting of her other interests.
As I said, she hasnt directly admitted it but whith each passing day it seems to be more the case.
Hello Siar,
Does your practice (or your girlfriend’s) involve meditation of any kind? Over time, meditation brings clarity and removes barriers to fully expressing real love. Not only for your partner, but for yourself and others in your life.
Wish you and your girlfriend the best. The realization you had is a step in the right direction, no?
With Love
cosmic
Its a good sign for the relationship when both are willing to make compromises