I want to conclude this thread with some of my understanding of conductivity gained from dedicated AYP practice, especially in these latest years. As mentioned I am retired (67) and have the time and extraordinary pleasure of volunteering and taking care of my body, hoping to get at least another thirty three years out of it, so far so good.
Our paths, our bodies, memories, experiences, hopes, desires, traumas bring us to our today, what challenges us, what brings us joy, and how we experience our everyday relationships, situations, and activities. Our practices bring us the silence needed to witness our history and our thoughts with separation. This yogi has come to understand, over time, that most of my thoughts were stories, not always reliable, truthful, or kind. Certainly there were issues I needed to ponder, or counsel with inner guru, or something creative to ruminate upon. Recently an increasingly amount of my idle time is becoming no-thought, fleeting, pure witness in a moment, fluctuating white noise of silence rising, morphing, in the background, a siddhi proving to me my practices are bearing fruit.
Conductivity easily fuels Bhakti, it is subtly pleasurable, making this yogi hyper-aware of my body. Long story short, my fifties had me battling many spinal issues I have since overcome, through medication, physical therapy, yoga, attention, and intention, and conductivity in those later years proved valuable in attending to my body every day. Once this body became conducive and matured, a knowing developed that yoga can be found in the every-minute, that spirituality blossoms beyond your meditation seat.
So what is conductivity? I can only report this yogi’s experience. After eight years, the experience of it has matured, from the early vague years of traces of tingles, to today as it manifests simply with very gentle attention and intention. The shushumna feels as a third lung with intentional breathing. It is subtle “inner winds”, vibratory, subtle sensations presenting, coming and going in the body, subtle building upon subtle; if this yogi is quiet and open enough it can spill into samadhi and/or ecstasy. If I am in DM there is nothing to do but return to the mantra and let everything pass by, but even outside of DM, conductivity arises with the eyes open, especially in asana class. This is where the idea of radiance becomes relieving and grounding, flowing lovingly out of your feet, hands, out of your heart and all three eyes. My body could not do this nine years ago.
Conductivity seems to signal this yogi should pay attention and keep checking inside. Conductivity allows me liberal access to inner silence, and the knowing it is a medium for sensations to come and go, to be felt, acknowledged, enjoyed, and released. Conductivity has connected sex and yoga. Conductivity makes surrender felt. Conductivity drives this yogi outside to ground, be in community, and experience the body in motion, in the moment. It is my desire, in my remaining lifetime, to accumulate these conductive (flywheel) moments, day after day, imagining them composting and altering my neurobiology, building body memories, and pleasure, and inner guru teaching me not to be afraid to chase liberation, it is mine to behold if Shiva is convinced of my devotion, he is just not so forthcoming yet.
