Blog #23: Air
http://ayprecovery.org/blog-23-air/
Today I was meditating with two dear friends under a beachside pavilion, and the sensation of the ocean breeze mingled with my inner scenery as I easily favored the mantra. The sound of waves carried through the air and touched my eardrums. Pelicans and seagulls flapped their wings and made bird noises in keeping with the rhythm of the wind. We were surrounded by air, and many spectacles in the air.
Air—it’s the gaseous medium above ground (and even underground) which allows external signals to travel to and fro. It invisibly fills the empty space as we breathe in its life-sustaining ingredients of nitrogen and oxygen. It’s the rich atmosphere contained within Earth’s field of gravity, underneath the exospheric envelope that merges with outer space.
Compared to the previously discussed elements of water, fire, and earth, air is the most subtle and refined. Air is receptive and nurturing. It buffers the fiery heat of the Sun (greenhouse effect) and absorbs the moisture of water in cyclical processes like precipitation. Air permits the flight of organisms and mechanical objects through its expansive field, and provides resistance and density to regulate the flow of sentient activity.
One of the most ecstatic activities I’ve had the privilege to participate in is throwing the frisbee. The frisbee really shows off how marvelous the element of air is. The flying disc spins at a quick velocity, and how graceful that piece of plastic can look as it glides from one person to the next!
The physicality of tossing the disc can be pure joy. The technique involves the entire body, with torque coming from the hips and arms, as well as a pivot in the feet and ankles, and finally, an orgasmic release with a flick of the wrist. Once let go, the frisbee soars freely for a substantial length of time until it reaches the open hands of an eager recipient. Without the buoyancy of air, this exuberant exchange of motion could not occur.
Actually, throwing the frisbee is reminiscent of the AYP practice of samyama. Frisbee requires a flick of the wrist, whereas samyama requires a flick of the heart-mind (in stillness). There is great finesse in both techniques, and in both cases, letting go into empty space is where the magic is found. The disc zooms through the physical air; the sutras of samyama zoom across stillness. We set an intention and heartfelt desire, then release that essence into a receptive medium. Simple, but powerful!
One of my favorite sutras in samyama is “Akasha - Lightness of Air”. That sutra cultivates a versatility and quickness in our being which allows us to move through spacetime all the more effectively—even artistically. Our marriage with inner silence and ecstasy will bring us closer to the miracles offered by Mother Nature. It is a divine dance.
Speaking of akasha, which is inner space, I will be covering that one in the the next blog.
Stay tuned!
Blog #24: Akasha – Inner Space
http://ayprecovery.org/blog-24-akasha-inner-space/
The manifest universe is a dream in the mind of God. My individual perspective is an extension of that dream, and therefore, we could say that the experience of individuality is a dream within a dream. One Big Dream…generating countless little dreams.
The element that links all the little dreams together is inner space, or akasha. It is the most subtle, profound, and all-encompassing of the five classical elements. And what is akasha made of? It is made of none other than consciousness itself. This manifest awareness is the fabric that holds together the content of our interior world (thoughts, emotions, relationships, energy, and so on).
Akasha rests on the edge of stillness and vibration, on the cusp of infinite and finite, on the border between physical and non-physical. It is a medium sewn into the tapestry of space and time. Because of its intricate and fundamental role in existence, akasha grants us the opportunity to bend the laws of physicality in ways that are far-reaching and mind-boggling.
Let me be more specific. Have you ever felt connected to someone who was very far away—separated by many miles of physical distance, yet somehow perceived to be immediately close to you, even within you? Maybe a long-distance friend came into your mind, then you received a phone call from them only moments later. At some point, these kind of synchronistic events happen to everybody, with varying degrees of lucidity and recurrence. It’s very natural.
Akasha is what makes such exchanges possible. The more tuned in we are to inner space, the more we can cross boundaries and distances that once seemed uncrossable. Such is the miracle of the infinite touching the finite.
As was mentioned in the last blog about air, there is a sutra in samyama called “Akasha - Lightness of Air”. Akasha and air are quite similar because they are both mediums which hold objects and allow those objects to traverse across their spaciousness. For air, it’s physical phenomena. For akasha, it’s the phenomena of the interior world.
Paradoxically, there is no absolute line dividing akasha and the other elements. Just as the atmosphere of Earth has no hardened boundary between itself and outer space (there are only layers overlapping each other), so does akasha intertwine with fire, water, earth, and air.
Because of this interconnectedness, we can see quite clearly that all of life is aware. All of life is connected. All of life is happening across a boundless field of awareness, which is the platform for the spacetime continuum.
Make contact with your inner space, and deepen that relationship. You won’t regret it.
Blog #25: Principles
http://ayprecovery.org/blog-25-principles/
I don’t sink my teeth much into dogmatic beliefs, but I still find it useful and worthwhile to refer to some guiding principles from time to time. In the last few years of recovery and ongoing enlightenment, here are some of the main ones that seem consistently true, and in line with the baseline of AYP:
—There is not much truth or effectiveness in claiming the identity of an alcoholic or addict, especially as a core part of self; due to its toxicity, drinking alcohol is inherently problematic, regardless of moderation, or lack thereof
—The ultimate source of addiction, which is bhakti (desire for union), is pure; what is impure are the inferior methods of satisfying that desire, and even such impurities stem from what is purest
—Personal willpower, the ego, and the mind, are not only extremely valuable in the spiritual quest of humanity, but also absolutely necessary for any progress to be made in recovery or enlightenment; active surrender is not a destruction of these three aspects of self (personal or impersonal), but rather an illumination of them
—The true litmus test of spiritual development is determined by a person’s radiance, a.k.a. outpouring of divine love, which occurs in both seen and unseen ways, and is easily discernible in mundane activities and interpersonal relationships—ranging from the most intimate to the most public
—Any spiritual teacher or teaching that leaves out (deliberately or unintentionally) the implications of cosmic consciousness (beyond Earth), is lacking fullness and depth at this stage in human evolution; imaginative theology and fictional mythology, though beautiful in their own right, are not the same as genuine cosmic consciousness
—The expressions of creativity, ingenuity, harmony, and genius—within all human endeavors—are direct reflections of our spiritual maturity, both as individuals and as a whole
—The flow of unity supports and sustains the reality of multi-faceted diversity, thereby honoring the paradox of the Many being One, and the One being Many
—The divine feminine and the divine masculine play malleable, but ultimately equal, parts in the miraculous dance of life
—The validity of any spiritual practice, belief, or technique can easily be determined in a scientific manner that relies upon direct observation of cause and effect, with personal experience being granted its necessary and proportional role in any analysis and drawing of conclusions
—The most sublime and supreme knowledge is knowingness, or unknowing, which is not dependent on objective facts, but rather on an inner peace that passes all understanding; even so, objective constructs and fixtures do not threaten or run contrary to the infinite silence and stillness which underlie all vibration
—Love is the beginning, middle, and end of all reality, including any perceived delusions that occur in the spectrum of unfoldment and beingness
This truth permeates my blissful arousals, revealing my androgynous soul 
So glad to hear, Dogboy. Thank you for reading.
Blog #26: Cleverness
http://ayprecovery.org/blog-26-cleverness/
In the novel Siddhartha by Herman Hesse, the young protagonist Siddhartha encounters the older Buddha and immediately begins to question the validity of the master’s teachings, to which Buddha replies: “You are clever, O Samana [wandering ascetic]. You know how to speak cleverly. Be on your guard against too much cleverness!”
That scene has always stuck with me. I totally relate to young Siddhartha’s cleverness. There have been plenty of times when I’ve tried to to outsmart this game of life. In fact, I would say that using drugs and alcohol is one big attempt to outsmart the mechanics of life, and enlightenment.
Since our body’s nervous system responds predictably to certain molecules and chemicals, we can tinker and toy with drugs and alcohol by artificially inducing preferred states of consciousness. For instance, let’s look at marijuana.
Marijuana induces a meditative state akin to the one resulting from Deep Meditation. With smoking pot, you just take a few tokes, and boom!—THC enters the respiratory system and bloodstream, then you are stoned in a matter of seconds. With meditation, the process of cultivating calmness can take considerably longer (though sometimes it happens pretty quickly), and instead of relying on an entheogenic plant, we rely on a native vibration within our own mind. See the difference?
Shortcuts can slow us down, and there is a price to pay when we trick the nervous system.
When I was in elementary school, I had a friend that brought counterfeit dollar bills to school one day. He had made a big stack of fake bills using a standard copy machine. It was nothing professional. They were black-and-white, paper copies and slightly blurry. Yet, I was able to use them in the change machine in the cafeteria. The sensor in the change machine saw the image of a dollar bill and was deceived, so it kept spitting out quarters, not knowing that I was fooling it.
Needless to say, I eventually got busted and had to pay back the money. As penance, the headmaster also made me read passages from the Bible. There was no beating with a paddle, however. Lucky me!
The nervous system is like that innocent dollar machine. The receptors receive the molecules, regardless of what is trailing behind the molecules. If there is a plant or chemical trail behind the molecule, it will be a somewhat artificial experience. If there is nothing but our own inner chemistry and emotions behind the molecular triggers, the experience will be more authentic and wholesome.
Even though I’ve been sober for several years now, I still have to be vigilant with my cleverness. Am I trying to outsmart basic necessities and stages of development? It’s a good question to ask contemplatively, and to let stillness reveal the answer. In the game of spiritual practices, there are still pitfalls, like falling into the illusion of attainment (“I have arrived; I am completely enlightened; I am beyond all life experiences.”)
The pitfalls are easily avoided by continually checking in with oneself on a gut and heart level, which means utilizing a childlike honesty as our mental and behavioral compass. That way, our cleverness is not bandied about recklessly or foolishly, but rather employed with skillful means, and for meaningful purposes.
And that’s all I’ll say about cleverness…for now… 
Lucky me also this passed away… 
Excellent entry, really liked it. I’ve often thought about the states arising from use of intoxicants vs. meditation, and how they are so similar. But using a substance to achieve that state probably hinders your ability and confidence of being able to attain it yourself. You give the power to something outside of you, so to speak. This is why I refrain from using alcohol as a social lubricant, I’d like to achieve that by myself. I’d like to know more what you think about the effects arising from repeatedly tricking your nervous system.
Nicely written, Bodhi. Infact very close to your Uncle Walt Whitman . So much fun in this samsara.
You’re a spiritual warrior, and I salute you for it.
I think it boils down to abrasiveness. The external ingestion of a substance results in more abrasiveness, kind of like rubbing sand paper of a coarser grit against the obstructions. The AYP methods are of a much finer grit, but even so, we have to use self-pacing, because there is still a process of purification.
For me, hangovers and other destructive consequences from drinking/drugging have far exceeded the pain threshold of practicing too much samyama, for instance. Anything can be overdone, but we are dealing with levels of vibration, and the effects vary accordingly.
On this note, that’s why I extol “sacred selfishness” as being valuable, because we are acting in the interest of our personal body, as well as others. AA tends to promote “selflessness” and a kind of martyr-like, sinner mentality, which doesn’t jive with me.
[OM] 
[OM]
Blog #27: Making Amends
http://ayprecovery.org/blog-27-making-amends/
Making amends is one of the touchiest topics in the domain of recovery. Within the architecture of the 12 Steps, Bill Wilson and Dr. Bob suggested a framework for cleaning up the past and repairing broken relationships. I won’t spend much time trying to validate or invalidate their strategy, but I will elaborate on how I run my own salvage operation. It’s a little different. Let me explain.
First, I’m all in favor of paying back debts, and I’ve done some of that—financially, emotionally, and karmically. A clean conscience demands restoring what has been damaged, returning what has been borrowed or stolen, and nurturing what has been neglected. Something deep inside always wants to regain balance if we are off kilter.
Even so, the past is incredibly long, and karma is unfathomable. If we take into account the possibility of past lives, it is not realistic to recall every single mishap along the way. What is realistic, however, is to adopt a way of moving forward, and that first involves making amends with ourselves.
In The Secrets of Wilder, the young spiritual aspirant asks: “Why not me?” What he means is: Why not me for a life of enlightenment, ecstatic bliss, and an outpouring of divine love? It’s a great question.
We have to be willing to say yes to being worthy of the transformation, if we want to make amends and move forward in a lasting way. When a butterfly emerges from its cocoon, there is no turning back. There is only fluttering and dancing about with new freedom and versatility. Does the cocoon have to be killed or surgically removed? No. It just gets shed naturally and easily as we spread our wings.
If we focus too much on the past, we will get stuck spinning our wheels with little progress being made. If we cultivate and feed a vision for our chosen ideal, we will make good use of the past, much like a plant makes use of recycled manure. Nothing is wasted, only processed and re-integrated. With enough alchemy and daily practice, even fodder can be turned to gold.
So, in my opinion, the best way to make amends is to work on enriching and developing our latent talents, rather than obsessing over supposed defects of character. If, like a bull in a china shop, I’ve wrecked some things in the past, I don’t need to curse my horns, or even have them removed. The horns may turn out to be great assets over the long-term. Maybe the horns will be the sharp instruments needed to polish the china. I can learn to use my horns with more finesse, refinement, and self-control.
There is great freedom and reconciliation in not only moving beyond harmful patterns, but also instilling new ones of joy, compassion and creativity. Then, the people who once feared us because of our carelessness, will in due time welcome us, because we will be overflowing with divine love and stillness in action.
Make amends by moving forward!
When a sail is torn, you must make ‘amend’; after that, if you can catch a tailwind, you’re good to go.
I like the cut of your jib, Bodhiboy! 
If we can live the present moment, we will see that there is no need for crawling, we have wings to fly.
Good work Bodhi
Dogboy! Sail away, sail away, sail away!
https://youtu.be/LTrk4X9ACtw
Charliedog, fly me to the moon :
https://youtu.be/mhZ2X9znPxM
Blog #28: Pain, Pleasure, and Transcendence
http://ayprecovery.org/blog-28-pain-pleasure-and-transcendence/
This week the U.S. Open tennis tournament started. Tennis is one of my favorite sports, and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed playing and watching the game in recent years. So, in this blog, I want to use tennis as a metaphorical lens to look at the important topics of pain, pleasure, and transcendence.
First, let’s define the terms.
What is pain? Pain is a kind of sensation. Pain is a sensory experience in which internal or external events are interpreted by the mind as being contrary to the well-being and desired trajectory of an individual, or group of individuals. In tennis, pain comes in different forms. For instance, one time I sprained my ankle while playing tennis, and that sensation was physically painful, but there was also emotional pain due to the mental disappointment of having to stop playing for an extended period of time.
One of the most tragic events in tennis history occurred when the champion Monica Seles was stabbed in the back while sitting on a break. That horrible act was obviously full of pain, not only for the victim, but for those that adored and supported her career. Fortunately, she was able to recover her health and even come back to win more championships. Surely, there was great pleasure in her return to the beloved game.
So, what is pleasure? Pleasure is also a kind of sensation, but one that is received with satisfaction and approval in regards to maintaining and improving our homeostatic condition. Pleasure is affiliated with happiness, enlightenment, and pure bliss consciousness, which is what we are cultivating with AYP. In tennis, there are many shades of pleasure, including the sustained endorphin buzz that arises when hitting the ball back and forth with an opponent or partner. Winning a hard-fought match can be full of elation, euphoria, and fulfillment, which are pleasurable qualities.
Finally, we have transcendence, which is a more abstract term. Transcendence comes from a Latin word meaning “to climb across, to climb beyond”. When we transcend something, we have traveled across a distance and arrived at a place beyond the original limits of our journey.
Roger Federer, often considered the greatest tennis player of all time, exemplifies transcendence, on and off the court. He displays compassion and divine love to the people he comes across, and that state of being is beyond the dynamic of winning and losing. The sublime calm he exudes is evident in the fluidity of his movement, and in the way he carries himself. He transcends the boundaries of competition, even while excelling within them.
In AYP for Recovery, we are transcending the narrowness of identification as an alcoholic or addict. We are going beyond the pain inflicted from hurtful tendencies and a damaged past. First, we replace the hurtful tendencies with superior habits like Deep Meditation, then we realize and directly perceive that we are, in fact, the blissful awareness that underlies all events, even the painful ones.
Pain and pleasure are supreme teachers in this life, and transcendence is the reward of learning (and un-learning) from that interplay. Even if we never win any grand trophies, we can still achieve greatness by following the spiral of peace and joy gained from daily practices, thereby living as embodied masters in this incarnation.
Game on!
Enjoyed reading this. Thank you Bodhi.
Hence trancendence
Excellent writing, Bodhi. Hubby is a sport fanatic and I’ll sit and watch few games with him. Just wanted to share a story regarding physical pain-With my second C section, I was a little too brave and confident and asked the hospital to take off the spinal IV early. When the medication starting wearing off, the pain was excruciating. While I was waiting on the nurse, the pain and bliss was going at the same time. My theory is- the bliss may be the infinite’s joy of experiencing physical pain through this body. At the same time not sure how long I would have endured the pain.
With emotional, mental pain instead of labeling it as pain/ discomfort,accepting and being with it reveals peace/stillness in the end. At least most days .
Sunyata
Charlie-D!
Wow. Very intense. An empathic sensation shot up my spine upon reading that vignette. Thank you for sharing your endurance and transcendence, sunyata.